That Time A Spider Drove Me Out Of My Apartment.

I remember when I served my country in Nasarawa State, in a city called Lafia. It was a compulsory one year community service under the freaking sun and in the freaking rain and this is putting it very, very mildly. I shared an apartment with my twin sister. One day, she decided to travel to go see my parents. Because I had a class to teach the next day I decided to stay back. I thought it was the best idea because it meant I had the whole apartment to myself to do whatever the hell I wanted.

It was a Saturday night and there happened to be light so I decided to watch Dark Skies, a scary movie. Half way through the movie NEPA took their nonsense light. If you’re from Nigeria, you know we are a joke to the Entergy system. You get accustomed to living in the dark and it doesn’t really scare or bother you anymore. My pastor once said when the light goes out, just sit in the dark and see what will creep up on you. That day, I promise you, I failed my pastor. It’s pretty humid in Lafia, so I would either sleep outside or on the cold tiles inside. That night, I laid on the tiles  inside trying to catch a shut eye. All of a sudden, I felt something on my body. I jumped up, turned on the torch to see what the hell it was, but it turned out to be a little insect. It reminded me of the time I was much younger in Abuja. I dried my khaki outside on a little tree so I could wear it to church on Sunday. Y’all, I left that Khaki for days on that tree. Sunday came around and as I wore the khaki I felt something crawling on my lap. Because I can’t remember the part in the Bible where God gave us dominion over every crawling thing, I began to scream for my Mommy. Then, I held the part where I could feel the thing crawling and I squeezed so hard, a green stain appeared on my khaki. I started screaming like a mad woman. My mother had to come in and tell me to remove the khaki because I really thought I was going to die. It turned out to be a caterpillar. I guess it didn’t get to be a butterfly after that.

Anyway, back to the original story. While I was breathing a sigh of relief that it was just an insect, I saw something really big move. You guys, I pointed the torch to the wall and I promise it was the biggest, fastest spider I had ever seen in my life. It was not the giant huntsman spider but it sure as hell looked like it. I called the blood of Jesus like a million times, got up, dressed up and ran to the living room. As I was shaking and pacing up and down thinking of what next to do, in the shadow I could see a movement. It was the same spider on the wall moving like Usian Bolt. I screamed because it looked like it was coming for me. I ran out of my apartment and decided I’ll stay outside till morning, at the time it was about 12 am. After about 15 minutes, I decided a stupid big fast spider was not going to kick me out of my own apartment. I summoned courage and opened the door, guess what? It was standing in the door way staring at me. As it moved, I ran straight into the bed room and locked the door. Throughout the night, in the dark, I felt like a thousand spiders were in my room crawling on my body. Coupled with the scary movie and the fact that the dark was just not a fun place to be in, I thought I was going to lose my mind. I was scared and couldn’t wait for my sister to get back. I didn’t miss her, I just thought two heads could take on that spider once and for all.

It didn’t turn out to be the case. This twin sister of mine came back on Sunday evening and while we were watching The Proposal on her phone, she felt something run down her body. When we looked at the wall, it was the same DAMN SPIDER. We both ran out still calling the blood of Jesus until our neighbors came to our rescue. Even after the spider was killed and the room was sprayed with insecticide I wasn’t able to sleep peacefully for two days. It still scares me a little when I think about it.

Call me a scary cat — IDC.

Follow @ayamba.theblog for more updates.

Picture retrieved from Pinterest.



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