Who should pay for a date?

I am constantly changing, rarely holding on to an opinion longer than necessary, but this I know to be true about dates because I have been on my fair share, it rarely goes according to plan. I haven’t had a date where I was in the mood to dissolve into a chair and be one with it because it was so bad. Neither have I had a date where I wanted the sky to consume me because it was perfect. My dates have been pleasant at best because I never packed expectations in my purse along with my makeup and wallet. When you go on a date, especially one of those blind dates, you take what you get and decide what you want it to be; something more or nothing at all.

So, who should be responsible for the bill? In my opinion and in the spirit of equality, whoever requests the date should be the one to pay for it. I don’t believe in splitting the bill. If you’re a lady and you encounter a man you want to get to know and requests he meets with you, you should be prepared to foot the bill for the date. The same goes for the man. I understand the concept of splitting the bill because everyone works hard for their money and if a date does not go well, one party shouldn’t have to pay for it. Or a date where one party gets from page 1 to page 15 on the menu and the other party just gets water and the complimentary bread. Paying for what you ordered comes in handy. But a date is not supposed to break the bank, especially a first date. There are so many less expensive date ideas out there that people can tap into. You can meet in the park for a picnic or a cafe for coffee. You can drive around (which is one of my favorites) or get drinks at a bar. The idea that dates have to be a black dress and black-tie event at a fancy restaurant is a pleasant one but not compulsory. If you guys are into the same hobby, you can center your first date around it.

Ladies, I understand that we were delicately made from the ribs of Adam and are God’s gift to men. So, we should just relax and be taken care of. But we should also remember that Eve fed Adam an apple, hence, the reason why we have to spend money on dates in the first place. My mom always says carry ‘vex money’ when going out on a date. It simply means always have enough money with you to pay for the date and get yourself home in one piece. In case the date goes awry and he picked you up, you shouldn’t have to be dropped off by a person you can not stand.

I’ll say this, do not agree to a date if you do not have the money for the type of date that is being planned. It is not very responsible on both the part of the man and the woman to go on a date with an empty purse or wallet. And for the beautiful girls who bring not just one but five of their friends out on a date that is meant to be between two people, that is just trifling behavior and should be checked at the door.

In summary, a date does not have to be an expensive elaborate plot to impress the other person. It can be but it shouldn’t have to be. The importance of a date is to connect and see if there is a potential future. If there is, that’s fine, if there isn’t, that’s fine too. So, pick places you can afford. And if you are the one requesting the date, be prepared to pay for it. Offer to pay for it. Insist to pay for it. Finally, while men also deserve to be pampered, I have heard stories of some men ‘forgetting’ their cards or wallets at home. Let’s not attract curses on ourselves, please.

Follow @ayamba.theblog for more updates.

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